I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
you will always have a special place in my vag
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
