if you like me you must not know who I am
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
When are your genitals available?
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize