She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
