Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Randomize