one two three fourrrrnication!
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
i came on her dog
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
There's always time for handjobs
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Randomize
