nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
