$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
