i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
