Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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