so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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