My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
