i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Randomize
