I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
