There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
