I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
