I'm gonna have a badass scar
You smell like a Billy Joel song
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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