holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
