It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
