what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i drank out of a bidet.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
