Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
