Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
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