we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
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Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
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I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
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