She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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