What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
