If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
