found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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