We're like a lot better than the average bears
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
The power of my boobs compel you
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
