marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
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