Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
