it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
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