in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
