So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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