If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
