I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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