Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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