Just fell off a train. Bad.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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