my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
