Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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