PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
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