Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
