How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
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