Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
