dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
