we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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