1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
