I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize