think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
