she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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