Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I smell stomach acid.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
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