I'm lost and stupid without you.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
